Home > Adventures > turkey eve-eve sheng feng roadtrip extravaganza: takeoff and busride

turkey eve-eve sheng feng roadtrip extravaganza: takeoff and busride


So the tiny black man and I might have pushed our differences aside and become friends. After all that he even asked me to use my iPhone so that he could get on Facebook to report all this madness. He had the balls to ask after our earlier exchange so I said why not. Whats even funnier is that his entire family is sitting around me. Literally in 85% of the seats around me. All of them got on their phones and called their family and friends to report the fact that he had asked for my phone. The conversations alone were worth me giving it to him. They berated him loudly on the phone to friends and family members while he could hear but could not do anything because I have the aisle seat. By the way, if I didn’t have the aisle seat, my knees would be inside my chest or inside the poor young lady in front of me. I have to move every time someone comes back here to shit, which must be everyone on the bus because the smell emanating from that bathroom is quite pungent. It stings the nostrils.

For some reason I didn’t see the drop down menu or link for purchasing leg room on the tickets website. I don’t know how I missed it, but I did. Stupid me.

Side thought: The woman one row up must be me in the form of a larger black woman because she is snoring herself awake every couple of minutes and the entire back of the bus is laughing hysterically at her snorts. I can only imagine how it would be going right now if I had enough room to sleep and her and I were doing battle; my snorts versus hers. She is quite a formidable opponent because her snorts have even caused people ¾ of the way up the bus to laugh. I think that she has an advantage in size, but I know I have a better lung capacity so I think that evens it out. Picture her and I in recliners in the middle of the Roman Coliseum. Lazy-boy lounging and conjuring up snorts and gasping breaths that echo through the amphitheater. Caesar looks around at his people and grants me the thumbs up because once again, she had the size advantage and the tigers were extra hungry. I win on a technicality, not because of my snoring prowess but because I would’ve been a tougher chew for the tigers and not as filling. That’s how I see it all going down.

Either way, I’m not dueling her because I think that someone in this crew around me will stick something in my mouth just to laugh.

Prior to the trip, my dad asked me how he would know I arrived home since this was a new pickup point for him. I liked his willingness to be prepared but this was unchartered territory for me as well and I had no idea what to tell him. So, me being me, I said “if you smell Chinese food or see cats running for the hills, I’m probably in the area.” I know that is generalizing, but I couldn’t help it. I have lots of Asian friends, though they are Korean. I love Asian food and asian people, I couldn’t let the joke go. I even passed it around the office as I professed my nervousness at attempting this journey through the Chinatown express. They laughed too so that it was immediate approval for the joke right there. If everyone laughs, its acceptable…or I need to choose new friends, but that aint happening.

Supposedly there is 2 hours left in this trip. My phone is about to die so I turned it off after my new friend updated his FB status, but not before texting Becky “Def needing whisky after this. Kill me” Cant wait to read her response. I can only imagine it would be something like “sounds good”. I love her for that. She is always ready to have a good time. That’s why we click and it helps that she just gets me. Really gets me for me and all my oddness along with all my madness. Whats crazy is that I have found the NY version of Becky up here. Never thought that could happen but My Friend Katie is Becky to a T. Just what I needed in the city! Becky, don’t worry, she doesn’t make humus I don’t think, but she is cool.

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