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LL Cool J is the original “Situation”

Before the freak show circus that is the “Jersey Show”, which we all watch whether or not we like to admit it or not, before the days of GTL (Gym, Tan, Laundry), before the days of GFF (Grenade Free Foundation), before MVP (Mike, Vinny, Pauly), before the days that MTV depicted all Jersey natives as a bunch of orange, hair-gelled, muscle bound fist pumpers or big-breasted skeezers…there was LL Cool J, the original “Situation.”

Mr. LL Cool J or “Ladies Love Cool James” was the situation before there was the “Situation.” If ever there was a bite on someone’s persona its with this guy. Mike from the Jersey Shore is the no-talent, bronzed, douchebag version of the Run DMC styled soulful lady killer from the 80s and 90s.

Lets run the comparison real quick so you can see what I mean.

LL flashed 12 pack abs back in the 90s
Situation flashed back abs on SNL in 2010
LL released “I Need A Beat” and scored 1.5 million sales for his rookie single
Situation beats beats up with fist pumps of fury until he scores with loose moraled jersey girls
LL has 2 Grammys
Situation will be lucky to get a Darwin award
LL is a fan of acronyms like on “NFA-No Frontin’ Allowed” (’93 single) and his album G.O.A.T.-Greatest Of All Time
Situation and friends dig acronyms too and have since coined GTL, GFF, and MVP which are all mentioned above
LL has a TV show thats up for Emmy consideration (NCIS)
Situation has the highest rated TV show on MTV
LL has talent
Situation has none, besides being good for a laugh. (we are laughing at you, not with you, but I do enjoy it so maybe you do have some sort of talent)

As you can see there are many similarities in this comparison. I feel as though the “Situation” is trying to pull a fast one on the whole MTV community by being who he is, but not me. Ive pulled the wool from my eyes and after watching “SWAT” starring LL Cool J the other night on FX, a lightbulb went off in my head. This epiphany is the reason for this post. The more research I did, the further I dug, the more I found in the way that LL should be suing the “Situation” for ab infringement and so much more. Ill have to ask some of my lawyer friends, but I believe that is something that could actually be sued for. Serious charges here. Hopefully this can be resolved without ruining someone’s career (can we say the “Situation” has one to begin with?).

Ab infringement, look it up. Totally viable option for a lawsuit…I think.

Th only downside to this epiphany was the fact that I actually had to look up pictures of both these guys. Typing into Google “LL Cool J Abs” and “Mike Situation Abs” was something I could go a lifetime without. I guess I was wrong. I lost man points on this one I guess, hope I can make them up somewhere else. Maybe killing a shark barehanded will do?

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